Pookiebear

Ok so I just bought my plane ticket to success. Well it was really to Seattle but I’m using it as my excuse. I’m going to my best friend’s wedding and I want to look great which means dropping the 20lbs that I’ve been avoiding. I want to show up in a dress and not be uncomfortable.  I know the whole day is about her, but I wanna have my own internal wedding. A wedding to the new me, one that continues to shrink, the one who realizes her goals and sticks with her commitments.  I will work hard and be successful. i’m starting back on Pilates today and making a diet plan so it will be almost impossible to fail. Here’s to celebrating a new family and a new me!!!!!

So I haven’t logged on here in like idk almost 3 months…..sorry buddies :(  It’s almost Christmas and here I am at the same place I was last year. I love holidays but inside my head I wish I could just skip them.  It’s not that I don’t thrive on the time with my family, it’s just that holidays mean pictures and pictures just remind me of my constant failure. I jump on the wagon because I think I have finally found the magic of motivation only to fall off the wagon a few days later when the yummy food and delicious sweets start calling my name and the motivation takes a hike laughing and waving as it goes.  I am in this alone it seems. I just don’t have an accountability partner that can be with me everyday. I don’t hold myself accountable either. It’s my own fault that I am this overweight…I know the right things to do and the good foods to eat but my uncontrolled self just ignores it. Oh well. At least I have made a step in the right direction by realizing I’m my own worst enemy. I will try to do better. I’ve decided to hold myself to 2 days of excercise a week. then when that becomes a habit I will try 3 days and so on. Hopefully(clinging tight to it) I will be down 10 by February. Then a new goal. Here’s to reaching our goals and living a healthy lifestyle!!!!!